Eleven
months and four days have passed since my last post. How does time get away from us so
fleetingly? The last year has been one
of the oddest we have ever lived, yet God has had His say, and victory has come
from Him and Him alone. I have decided
to write and fill in posts where they belong in the year, so the blog has
filled up with new posts that were not there before. When I last wrote, Maggie had moved out just
four months prior because of differences in how she wanted to live compared to
how we wanted to live. Allowing your
adult children to make adult choices, yet maintaining the integrity of your own
home has proven a challenge for Curtis and me.
Each child is different and interprets the world through her own lens,
yet our fundamental values do not change.
Curtis and I have long since held that each person is free to choose the
lifestyle he wants within the context of the home he sets up for himself. This is our home, and we have chosen the
lifestyle we want. If one does not like
it, one is free to leave and live his own life, but living in our home, we hold
to values and beliefs we believe to be true and right and good and that these
choices lead to life and peace. Maggie
has had her own walk, and has decided that Jesus is, in fact, the only
way. Her story is profound, and I hope
she shares it with the world in due time.
We are in the process of being restored to her, and these holidays
promise lots of making up for lost time.
Soon after
Maggie left, troubles with Madison and Joel surfaced needing immediate
attention. They had struggled for their
four years together with patterns of brokenness that now threatened to end their
marriage. Isabella was only 6 months old when Madison moved in with us to seek
counsel and get help for her and Joel.
If this had all transpired a year earlier, there would’ve been no room
in the inn. God’s timing to deal with
our sin, to work on our behalf to set us free, is flawless, and holds the most
accommodations for our present needs. He
is good! Giving us each the dignity of
our free will, He works in the hearts of men to reveal the truth while we
remain in doubt of His absolute goodness and forgiveness. He gently persuades, convincing those that
sincerely desire truth that He alone is able and has accomplished all we could
ask or think to bring about life for our benefit and His glory. Joel was angry and upset, at first believing
we had an encampment against him set up in our home, but he soon came to
realize that every single Parnell loves him, and no one was mounting attacks to
take him down. He and Curtis began
meeting together to help sort out the misunderstandings and marital strife, and
within that same 6 months, Madison and Joel went from hopeless and broken sure
to divorce, to moving into their first home together only 2 miles from
Papa. They have lived in apartments
their entire marriage, and now they are proud homeowners! The crazy thing is that we had come to love
her presence despite the inconvenient logistics of a crib back in the girls’
master closet, nap time schedules again, clothes, rockers, and baby equipment
for Isabella all over the girls’ room.
There wasn’t a dry eye the day she and Isabella drove away with their
knight in shining armor. God used the
time she spent at home with us for the first time since she left at 18 to heal
and mend our own broken places in our relationships with her. Sad stories and hurt feelings were healed and
sealed for good. The work began anew
during our Ireland trip, but was completed forever this year. HALLELUJAH!
Madison found out after only a month here that
she was pregnant with their second baby, a little boy. As I write this, she is due!
Curtis Wade
graduated Salutatorian in his class from Full Sail University on October 4 this
year! Curtis, Papa, and I had the privilege of traveling to Florida to attend
and celebrate with him. We moved him
home that weekend, and what a blast that weekend was! We took in the carport
this year to make room for the older three boys to have the upstairs bedroom,
and the younger three boys to take what was the study for their bedroom. The carport is now our office/school room
space and is working beautifully. Curtis and Curtis Wade have their own desks
and computer spaces to office out of the house and for Curtis Wade to pursue
the internship opportunities afforded him upon his graduation.
Our updates
and remodel to the house have proven beneficial and necessary, although we are
looking in earnest at relocating to east Texas.
We have been in this house for 12 years, but this kitchen will only hold
so many no matter how we shake it up. We
either overhaul our downstairs or sell to take advantage of the unbelievable
Texas real estate market, and purchase more house and property we could afford
here in town. The highways and bi-ways
are becoming so congested that getting to Madison’s and Joel’s new home only 24
miles south can take an hour. We want to
finish raising our brood in the same kind of wide open spaces the older ones
had upon moving here 12 years ago. The
properties around us are now built up with massive estate mansions and the
pastures and ponds are fenced in and inaccessible anymore.
Though
Curtis started with Shoppa’s Material Handling last December, he soon realized
that he simply didn’t jive with the corporate red tape-laced environment
prevalent at Shoppa’s. He was given no
real authority to make the changes he was hired to make. He was met with unbelievable frustration this
entire year and knew this was not where he belonged. In October, his experience at Shoppa’s ended
and we asked the Lord in earnest what was next.
Within three and half weeks, Curtis began in yet a new opportunity with
an outfit in Florida to set up the equivalent of NAWL once again. His reputation precedes him and there are those
who want to capitalize on Curtis’ talents.
This time, Curtis will be part owner and we will benefit from the
subsequent sale of this new company. Super
exciting! This business associate and
friend is allowing Curtis the space to do what he knows how to do without
committees interfering with progress. No
board meetings, no sales meetings, no votes or opinions….just Curtis doing what
he does best. Relief and renewal and a
new attitude for Daddy! Curtis had been largely unavailable to us this year,
and wives were seldom included in company events, so I was never invited to
participate. Curtis and I don’t dance to
that particular corporate two step. He
was the most miserable I had ever seen him, and this year did not seem like
progress. In fact, by spring of 2019,
the world seemed mean, unpredictable, and like answered prayers are a thing
found only in fairy tales. With Madison
and Joel falling apart and the grief that accompanied many of those long hard
days, Maggie disenchanted with family, chastity, and religion, Curtis Wade
thinking on many days he wouldn’t make it to graduation, and Curtis tied up in
knots at work, all of the hope of last year’s progress came to a screeching
halt.
One thing at
which I continue to marvel each and every season of our lives is the
unprecedented peace found within the four walls of our home during trials and
tribulation. There is so much joy. We still laugh, and we still sleep really
well. Kitchen conversations thrive with
hilarious stories of a day in each one’s respective lives. Dinner time around the table is cohesive and
warm. We laugh at the babies, we cry together, and we pray together A LOT. Each night we read the Bible together as a
family before bed, and each morning there’s a huge pot of coffee waiting in the
kitchen with blankets and cartoons in the den.
We greet each other with hugs, and we watch a favorite docudrama at
night in pjs with popcorn and the older kiddos before turning in. It is what it is, and nobody with their drama
or accusations changes it….EVER. The
Lord has taken us through a course this year in rising above the circumstances
at a whole new level.
We had a
threat made against our family in the spring of someone calling CPS to make
accusations in an array of areas concerning our family life. Though we prepared with our attorney’s
numbers on the fridge, and instructions to the children how to handle anyone at
our door, we didn’t see any action throughout the spring or summer. Then, one day in the fall, Curtis called me
when I was out running errands to tell me a CPS agent was on our front porch
interviewing one of our teens based on VAGUE accusations made from an undisclosed
source. I abruptly turned around and
headed home. I called my dad, my mom, and
my closest friend who knew the teen involved VERY well, and we agreed in prayer
together before I made it home. I
introduced myself upon arrival, and the very pleasant and unassuming social
worker enlightened me as to the accusations.
They were unbelievably absurd and unfounded, and within 45 minutes of
her visit, she stated that there was obviously a misunderstanding in the information
the accuser had. What is alarming to me
is that CPS has the authority to undergo an intrusive investigation obtaining
social security numbers, photos of each child, and photos of the inside of your
home based not on an eye witness to a crime, or even an injury to a child, but
based on hearsay, or an idea. What we
believe to have happened is that a jealous friend of a friend placed the call
to put our teen in jeopardy and remove that one from “competition,” if you
will. In this particular “court of law”
you are guilty until proven innocent, and it is the only court in the land
where you are not permitted to face your accuser. Things must change. Of all the things in the world I dreaded to
face, that was it. I have heard and read
the horror stories of children removed from their homes with no proof of
wrongdoing and becoming wards of the state until some judge orders CPS to stand
down. I am party to a battle at a
national level for parental rights to be honored and sustained in our
courts. Visit www.parentalrights.org for more info.
God showed
me something….all of us something. We
win. He has already secured our peace
and safety in the promises of His Word, and when we take Him at His Word, we
experience the benefits of His promises fulfilled. Even though there are those
whose stories did not end the same way, that is NOT my story. My story is based on the promises of
Scripture and my willingness to trust in those promises and the One Who made
them. I actually did not panic. Neither
did Curtis panic. We walked it out in
quiet resolve, and waited until we received the official letter of
exoneration.
At one point
this year, the news on the table for our family looked like this:
Curtis is
out of a job.
CPS is
investigating our family.
Our
refrigerator is out and Sears is out a week for the repair.
Madison and
Joel are divorcing and she may need to abide here permanently with a baby due
in December.
I am
bleeding internally and they want to do tests to find out where. (Which
resolved itself, and was found untrue.)
Our
contractor could not finish the carport remodel before Curtis Wade was to move
home.
There are
two cars in need of repair after a fender bender on our own property, thus two
deductibles due.
….and there
were no guarantees of ANY changes on the horizon. Enough bad news for nervous breakdowns, severe depression, and mental hospital
cases.
NOT HERE,
BABY!! NOT IN THIS HOME. JESUS IS LORD.
His peace reigns. His victory ensues. The devil slinks away grinding his teeth in
anger, his own hopes thwarted. On
several of those days, I took the kids to the park by the lake and we
played. I watched as they ran, free of
concern, and I meditated how God wants me free of concern, trusting in Him. I
acted free. I behaved like a free
person. I trusted. Today, we ARE free. Within months, and in some cases days, each
threat vanished, each panic button was disabled, each accusation was
vindicated.
This season,
I am so very grateful to settle in to family and a calm we haven’t had for
several months. I am working feverishly this week while Curtis and Curtis Wade
are out of town in Florida to finish up the shopping, wrapping, blogging, and
Christmas cards so that after our Christmas Symphony celebration night with
Papa this weekend, I sit with the children, have friends over, and talk about
God’s goodness and faithfulness to us all. We’ll have egg nog, hot chocolate,
and enjoy the Christmas tree and the lights listening to my all-time favorite
music, Christmas carols.
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