Reminiscing

    We held our annual January media fast this month. Instead of vegging on YouTube videos of prophecy, news, weather phenomena, and prepping updates, we took time to dig out old photos and hard drives full of Parnell history.  After a week of this delightful journey, I came to some profound conclusions.

    First of all, with once again strained relationships within the family, I have been taught in recent years to believe that the precious treasure of the home I created was fundamentally dysfunctional and unhappy. I have had to deal with not-so-happy moments, to be sure; but my overall memory is of God's faithfulness and countless answered prayers.  Was I truly locked inside an unreal bubble disassociated with reality? I have been told as much. To the contrary, this is what I found. 

    From video after video, many of them candid moments in the middle of the mundane days taken by the children themselves, I saw tremendous peace, respect for one another, gentle love for the youngest in the group, and lots and lots of laughter.  Click after click, photo after photo, God's faithful hand of redemption and power became consistently evident. I saw the hotel where we stayed shortly after the threat of divorce raised its ugly head. Although I distinctly remember the week before was subjected to the worst torment we would ever face again in our marriage, I saw Curtis and I together and in love. I saw that God answered our cry for Him to intervene and help us. He did! 

    I saw children excited to receive yet another new life into our family with no negative perspective of the close quarters in which we all operated during a normal day. Babies eternally entertaining each one of us to the point of tears for laughing so hard. So many helping hands that no one person seemed "put out" at the obvious load of people and personalities. From birthday dates with their daddy to Bible reading each night together, from puppies that became our household delights to loads of laundry we were ever working through, we were fundamentally happy. 

    Though Curtis has always provided the most beautiful addresses that our area offered, I saw the scratches on the walls, the worn furniture, the stained carpet, but no one seemed to notice. The prevailing beauty of heaven seemed to permeate our surroundings, the very air itself. I looked intently for the disparaging stories, the sadness, the oppression.  Although, I know each of us had our own insecurities, our own perspectives, and our own pain, I saw how much sincere love saturated the atmosphere. What I began to see was how God wants to minister to each of us, in and through each of us.  He resides within us.

    What I learned from the Lord as I took it all in was how love truly does conquer all. Love covers a multitude of sins. With the love of God present in our hearts, the bad days come to no consequence. They have little to no impact for evil. Love stops it dead in its tracks. Love patiently endured to see through to fruition all of the good waiting in the wings of heaven. By choosing to love in spite of a persons bad attitude, or propensity for evil, that very evil was conquered. When dominion within a certain realm, be it an established home, a business, or some organization, is brought under the authority of King Jesus, this kind of love conquering power exists at will. 

    What I learned was that any attempt to separate or alienate one from this union with one another is evil. To make us feel unwanted, unloved, unworthy, not needed, or irrelevant is the goal of such dissention. It is most keenly revealed within the construct of a family, but the same evil seeks to unravel such holy union in any group desiring to sincerely follow the Lord. How do we overcome? How do we heal from wounds inflicted by those we love the most? Love. Not merely touchy-feely kind that seeks a soulish emotional response, but the agape that lays down ones life for the benefit of another. There truly is something to keeping your "head in the clouds," untouched (by choice) by the evil on the ground operating in the lower realm. We actually have the power to operate in the heavens. We are told that we ARE seated with Him in heavenly places. That is not after our final exit from earth, rescued out to the far reaches of another location beyond the stars. That is today. It is now. 

    To begin to see that any evil operating in and through another person is truly satanic and not originating within that person helps to identify the real enemy.  It is deception believed by that one to lead him away from the love of God. If you've heard or read anything from earlier years in my life, you know I do believe in healthy boundaries in a relationship to deter evil with which one decides to partner.  No, you are not to engage with one practicing immorality, disobedience, or rebellion; but when a person fundamentally wants goodness, wants the Lord, mistakes and bad days can be righteously overlooked. It is almost as if that if we account for bad actions, so does heaven, and that becomes our reality; but if we do not account for bad actions, neither does heaven, and the absence of those things in our lives becomes our reality. Although this sounds ethereal, I truly believe it holds merit. I think I'm living it. 

    I am so grateful. I fell in love with our history all over again. I was overwhelmed to the point of tears with humble gratitude and contentment at the days and hours that came together to form the years of our family's story. Love is redemption. As I learned to let go of the fairytale I demanded of my life, I saw God write in infinitely more than I could've ever imagined of powerfully redemptive love and victory. We are the clay, He is the Potter. I am persuaded to fully yield. It comes much more easily now that I've learned He is real and He is trustworthy. He IS love.

    I pray each and every child I've brought into this world by His grace will embrace the same conclusion and thereby receive the same POWERFUL peace into his/her world. May each of their stories encompass the redemption of the cross and the power of His resurrection, in Jesus name.